As Seen On TV …

With my FIOS DVR unit I am finally able to view those wonderful TV ads in detail. These are not only the technology TV ads, but other sales pitches as well. In a previous column I had investigated the finallyfast.com TV ad and discovered that free download seemed to always mark your PC as needing improvement. Either no matter what you did to your PC, it was marked as deficient. If you ran the $130 worth of programs being sold, they probably set something in the Windows Registry that made the diagnostic say your PC was finally fast. I did notice that the download speeds in the TV ad were simulated and not real. This was stated in the fine print flashed during the advertisement.

Fine print is a great and revealing thing. The problem with TV ads is that you need a DVR Set Top Box (STB) to be able to read the fine print. The $14.99 per month diagnostic service advertised on TV is somewhat misleading. When you pause and read the fine print you find that a 10 month minimum contract fee applies, there is a $59.99 start up payment, that there are some (older and slower like I am older and slower) PCs which are not supported, and that other fees may apply. So this is not $14.99 per month to fix all PC problems. I think my $200 service that often lasts two years is cheaper.

The most outrageous TV ads are “the work from home” ads. They show these nice looking people (obviously none of them are bald old nerds like myself) driving fast and exotic cars ( I should have kept my Corvette) coming out of multimillion dollar homes (well maybe they are just in front of these homes), or alternatively seated around the swimming pool. They claim to make $5,000 per month or higher. How can you go wrong with this? All you need is a computer and you can make this money and live in these houses and drive these cars. Of course none of that will grow my hair or take the nerd out of me.

Now to the fine print paragraph – yes it is a paragraph. This is not a direct quote but a paraphrase of the wording. First the people are all actors. No people that actually work from home are in the ad because they are too busy working their fingers to the bone at home. The homes and cars are not the homes of these people unless they make enough money acting to afford the homes and cars. Finally, the amount of earnings is the potential earnings and not necessarily what the typical person working from home earns.

Now I support at least two people working from home. They make a living but not a lavish living. They work hard. And they can work at home because they have special skills and knowledge. They can make more money by working accurately and fast because they are paid by the job. They also love the commute to work.

Next how do these people advertising make money? What about the people giving away the free CDs? What a deal!! The CD is free – except for shipping and handling of $6.95. So I give away a $0.50 CD and mail it for another $1.00, how much is left? Yes indeed $5.45. So $5.00 goes to advertising on TV and the remainder pays salaries and overhead. I could send these out for free year after year. Also if they buy the next one, they pay something like $69.95. Now your revenue margin is now $64.50. One free and one sale and you are carrying money to the bank in wheel barrows.

Finally, there are the legal ads. You have this, contact us and we sue for you. Well, the fine print says that these are referral services that send your information to a local lawyer in your state who pays for it. The local lawyer may or may not be a specialist in that specific type of litigation. The quality of their representation varies. But the local lawyer licensed in your state is the one doing the work.

Just do not get me started with the S…wow. As seen on TV is successful because our eyes mislead us and we only catch what we wish to believe.